Chrissy Teigen opens up on sobriety struggle. The model described how she'd fallen off the wagon but was working to be a non-drinker again. In a heartfelt post, Chrissy, 40, explained she had stayed sober for just over one year but had slipped after deciding she wanted to be able to celebrate special occasions with alcohol. ”After being sober for a little over a year, I went back to drinking," she admitted. ”I promised myself it would be in a "mindful" way. I wanted to be able to have a glass of wine on a date night with my husband. To be able to toast on birthdays. How lucky I am to have the life I have - I want to enjoy it!”. Describing this "reward" mindset as "my first problem", Chrissy went on to confess it hadn't taken long for the occasional drink to become a regular event. ”Soon it became the kind of drinking I'm all too familiar with," the TV presenter, who shares children Luna, Esti, Miles and Wren with musician husband John Legend, wrote. ”Quiet moments at home were for wine. The time went from 6pm, to 5, to 4, to aw hell, it's lunch, why not. When it got to 11am, I was like, oh f**k, here we go again.” Having publicly celebrated her sobriety in the past, Chrissy explained she was hopeful a more low-key commitment might be easier to stick with. ”I think the biggest difference between now and the first time is that there's no pomp around it. The first time I put my foot down, it was EXCITING. The momentum was fun and kept me going on the right track.” “The second time... I dunno. I dunno if everyone around you kind of loses faith or if you do yourself, or a mix of both. Or maybe no one wants to get too excited.” Comparing her relapse to a bad relationship, Chrissy stated she was almost two months into her second attempt at sobriety. ”Like an old boyfriend you talked so much s**t about to your friends, then you get back together with them and everyone just stops caring because who knowwwwws what's gonna happen next. But I'm 52 days sober again with no desire to turn back.”